{"id":239160,"date":"2022-11-01T16:23:10","date_gmt":"2022-11-01T20:23:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/?p=239160"},"modified":"2022-11-01T16:23:13","modified_gmt":"2022-11-01T20:23:13","slug":"heartstopper-kit-connor-coming-out","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/culture\/heartstopper-kit-connor-coming-out-239160","title":{"rendered":"Kit Connor\u2019s forced coming out and the problems of queer fandom"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"is-style-article-kik\">OPINION: The \u201cHeartstopper\u201d star is 18. He shouldn\u2019t have been forced out by fans<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-drop-cap\">Kit Connor didn\u2019t necessarily want to come out. Not like this. On Monday, the 18-year-old <em>Heartstopper<\/em> star returned from an offline hiatus to briefly share a message to Twitter coming out as bisexual, casting something that is usually seen as celebratory in an understandably sour glow.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-twitter wp-block-embed-twitter\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\"><p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">back for a minute. i\u2019m bi. congrats for forcing an 18 year old to out himself. i think some of you missed the point of the show. bye<\/p>&mdash; Kit Connor (@kit_connor) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/kit_connor\/status\/1587218539236188160?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">October 31, 2022<\/a><\/blockquote><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cback for a minute. i\u2019m bi. congrats for forcing an 18 year old to out himself. i think some of you missed the point of the show. bye,\u201d the British actor wrote.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>His declaration came following months of relentless speculation, discussion and obsession from fans around the actor\u2019s sexuality.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Heartstopper<\/em> premiered on Netflix earlier this year as a streaming adaptation of Alice Oseman\u2019s graphic novel of the same name. The series follows two boys in high school, Charlie (Joe Locke) and Nick (Connor) as they fall in love and navigate friendships, coming out and questions of identity. The series was <a href=\"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/culture\/heartstopper-netflix-personal-essay-222404\">praised for its sweet and warm depictions of young love<\/a>\u2014 particularly the exploration of Nick\u2019s bisexuality\u2014and for its diverse cast of queer and trans youth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But until now, unlike many of his castmates, Connor hadn\u2019t publicly identified his sexuality. And many fans seemed to take issue with that absent label, particularly when <a href=\"https:\/\/www.pinknews.co.uk\/2022\/09\/12\/heartstopper-kit-connor-deletes-twitter-queerbaiting\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">images of Connor holding hands with actress Maia Reficco<\/a> circulated in September with suggestions that the actor was straight playing gay\u2014despite bisexual people who date other genders definitely being real! Connor temporarily left Twitter due to the public scrutiny and accusations that he was \u201cqueerbaiting.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ultimately, this entire situation shows a fundamental flaw in our cultural expectation of what makes for \u201cgood\u201d queer representation onscreen and off, and how we still have some work to do in its understanding of identity and representation.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>What does queerbaiting mean?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>The notion of queerbaiting is pretty nebulous these days, with fans quick to use it in reference to everything from Harry Styles\u2019s magazine covers to Madonna\u2019s TikTok.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But in its origin, queerbaiting was meant to describe a marketing technique, often for a piece of media, that hinted at queer content, but didn\u2019t actually follow through. For fellow members of my very specific generation on Tumblr, the prime example is <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.insider.com\/supernatural-last-episode-when-destiel-queerbaiting-end-fandom-tumblr-2020-11\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Supernatural<\/a><\/em>, a show that teased a central gay relationship between Dean and Castial, but didn\u2019t pay off until the series\u2019 end. Or the BBC <a href=\"https:\/\/collider.com\/tv-shows-that-queerbaited-their-fans\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Sherlock<\/em> <\/a>series that features its fair share of longing glances between Watson and Holmes, but no actual acknowledgement of anything queer going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But it\u2019s a lot more complicated when we start talking about real people. Were <em>Queer Eye <\/em>stars Jonathan Van Ness and Antoni Porowski queerbaiting when they t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.buzzfeed.com\/natashajokic1\/jonathan-van-ness-antoni-porowski-backlash\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">eased a new brand partnership<\/a> with language and social media posts that hinted they were dating last month? Is a straight\u2014or at least apparently straight\u2014actor queerbaiting when they play a queer character?\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To put it simply: no! A straight or straight-passing actor playing an openly queer character is not queerbaiting! It\u2019s a whole different thing, and the fact that that term has continually been tossed around shows fans\u2019 fundamental misunderstanding of what\u2019s going on here. The entire situation with Connor highlights a reductive sense of identity politics when it comes to queer (or not) actors and the portrayal of queer characters. In 2022, it\u2019s not as simple as queer actor playing queer = good, straight actor playing queer = bad.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>When straight playing gay is okay<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Yeah, there have been some pretty egregious examples of straight\/cis (or apparently straight\/cis) actors playing queer or trans characters (hi, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.usatoday.com\/story\/entertainment\/celebrities\/2021\/11\/22\/eddie-redmayne-says-danish-girl-trans-role-was-mistake\/8720144002\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Eddie Redmayne<\/a>), but there are a slew of actors who are celebrated for playing queer despite all indications that they\u2019re straight. Fans cheered when director Rian Johnson <a href=\"https:\/\/www.avclub.com\/rian-johnson-knives-out-benoit-blanc-gay-obviously-1849666247\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">described Daniel Craig\u2019s Benoit Blanc<\/a> from the <em>Knives Out<\/em> films as being queer. And Cate Blanchett (who my partner described as being married to the most boring-looking man in the world) is garnering <a href=\"https:\/\/www.thewrap.com\/tar-film-review-cate-blanchett\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">rave reviews<\/a> and Oscars buzz for her climactic turn as a lesbian in <em>T\u00e1r<\/em>\u2014just as she did a decade ago in <em>Carol.<\/em>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Those two know what they\u2019re doing, have stated who they are and have also demonstrated a fondness and allyship to queer folks again and again (just look to Blanchett\u2019s <a href=\"https:\/\/www.theguardian.com\/film\/2018\/oct\/20\/cate-blanchett-defends-straight-actors-playing-gay-characters\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">many interviews<\/a> on the subject and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.out.com\/celebs\/2021\/10\/13\/daniel-craig-loves-gay-bars-says-hes-sick-hetero-bars\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Craig\u2019s noted adoration of gay bars<\/a> alongside wife and fellow <a href=\"https:\/\/www.glaad.org\/amp\/rachel-weisz-stars-queer-lead-films-nominated-glaad-media-awards-2019\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">frequent player of gay<\/a>, Rachel Weisz).\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cI will fight to the death for the right to suspend disbelief and play roles beyond my experience. I think reality television and all that that entails had an extraordinary impact, a profound impact on the way we view the creation of character,\u201d Blanchett told <a href=\"https:\/\/www.advocate.com\/film\/2018\/10\/22\/cate-blanchett-defends-straight-actors-playing-gay-roles-stirs-fury\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">the <em>Hollywood Reporter<\/em><\/a><em> <\/em>in 2018.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Blanchett\u2019s comments speak to the ideal world I and many others aspire to when it comes to representation in film: queer actors can play straight just as a bisexual actor can play gay or a straight actor can play bi, so long as they\u2019re doing it right. I like to optimistically think we\u2019ve moved past an era of queer people only getting cast (and paid) for queer roles.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But one key thing separating Criag and Blanchett from Connor is age. He\u2019s 18. I don\u2019t know about you, but when I was 18 I thought I was a very different person and used very different labels to describe myself than I do 10 years later. At that time in my life I leaned toward avoiding labels altogether, because I didn\u2019t know which one quite fit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>One of the great things about the progress we\u2019ve made as a culture in LGBTQ2S+ representation is how we don\u2019t have to put people into neat boxes any more. Genders change. Sexualities change. The words we use to describe them and ourselves are constantly in flux. It\u2019s an exciting time to be a young person, because ostensibly you don\u2019t have to have all of the answers right away. You don\u2019t have to \u201ccome out\u201d as straight or gay or anything until you\u2019re ready. It\u2019s part of the reason young people are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.washingtonpost.com\/dc-md-va\/2021\/02\/24\/gen-z-lgbt\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">increasingly identifying as non-binary<\/a>: why stick to one gender and box yourself in?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It\u2019s the sort of utopia so many of our queer and trans ancestors who came before us have fought for. Or so it seems: what happened to Connor shows that fans haven\u2019t moved as far forward as maybe we\u2019ve hoped.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I ran a fandom Tumblr account for years, so I understand how important and meaningful it can feel for the person who made your favourite piece of media that reflects your identity to also reflect your identity themselves. But it\u2019s more complicated than that, and we\u2019ve got to remember that performers are real people\u2014and in this case a young person just coming into adulthood with this huge spotlight on him. Give them time, give them grace and celebrate the fact that they get to figure this out on their own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"is-style-end\">When they\u2019re ready, they\u2019ll tell us.&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>OPINION: The \u201cHeartstopper\u201d star is 18. He shouldn\u2019t have been forced out by fans<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1177,"featured_media":239163,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"editorial_slug":"10","_editorial_slug":"10","exclude_from_latest_block":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,10],"contributors":[1933],"topic":[75,162,142],"clients":[],"series":[],"timeliness":[58],"editorial_format":[25],"type-of-work":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/239160"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1177"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=239160"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/239160\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":239244,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/239160\/revisions\/239244"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/239163"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=239160"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"contributors","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/contributors?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"topic","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/topic?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"clients","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/clients?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"timeliness","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/timeliness?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"editorial_format","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/editorial_format?post=239160"},{"taxonomy":"type-of-work","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/xtramagazine.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/type-of-work?post=239160"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}